Late Night Thoughts

When it’s 3am and I can’t sleep

My thoughts roam to the demons that rule this hour 

I avoid looking in mirrors

I don’t dare make too much 
At 4am the real demons come 

The ones that make sleeping impossible
Am I doing enough ? 

Am I enough ? 

Is this the right path ? 

Will my life ever be okay ?

Am I unlovable ? 

Why can’t I be like her ?

Will ever defeat my struggles ? 

Why does everyone run away ? 

The time when he kissed my neck and I questioned respect 

The time when the glass slit my ankle 

Or the police at the door

How could I be so stupid ? 

The time when I believed his words 

All the times of him and other women 

Why would I even think of that ? 

Does it even matter ?

Am I his number one choice ? 

How did I ruin that friendship ?

How do I know anything for sure ? 

Is it in a promise ? 

Will I ever be okay ? 

2 thoughts on “Late Night Thoughts”

  1. I’ve grappled with the night demons – they were deafening during my months with anxiety early in 2017. These days they are dormant but I am wary they are still alive. I would say that you will be ok Sylvia, but I’m sure you know that dear lady 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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