There’s going to be times when you are going to be in extreme emotional pain. You may grab at your skin because your aching to escape it. Pulling your hair to just grasp at something. You are going to wonder if you ever are going to make it through it. The pain seems never to end, and everything seems hopeless. You may no longer see the light at the end of the tunnel.
I felt like that this weekend. I reached my breaking point. I was dying to crawl out of my skin. I was feeling hopeless and alone. I felt broken. I didn’t know how to stand back up on my own feet. I still don’t know. I reached out to a friend and felt better, but that doesn’t change the issues I’m facing. It can help my outlook on it though.
Sometimes life sucks. It does. When you have anxiety and depression, it makes it so much worse. Sometimes you have to fight for things that are hard. Things that crush you. It can push you to your limit. Question who you are. Question your instincts. Question if you are making the wrong decisions.
When I look past my anxiety and depression, I can find what I truly feel. What my heart hearts want. I can find my truth. What is true. So I hold on to that. I push past everything else. I am pushing back fear and anxiety and depression, and I will hold on to what I know is true. Because I don’t have much else. I find what feels right. What feels natural. Not what my anxiety and depression try to tell me is true, but what I truly believe. I’m going to stick with that. I’m going to have faith in that. I’m going to believe and fight for me. The real me. So everyone can see it too. I’m going to fight so I will no longer hurt anyone else. I’m going to proud of myself. I’m going to have my loved ones proud of me.