Writing is an outlet for my anxiety and depression. It becomes a type of therapy. Writing the thoughts that won’t stop spinning in my head. I started sharing because I thought it could benefit others. Also, I have to admit; I shared in part because it helped my mental health to share. It gave me… Continue reading When Writing & Sharing Become Difficult With Anxiety & Depression
I’m not sure if people understand. For the most part, I don't know if others understand how much I’m trying. I can understand why it seems like I don’t. I fail a lot. I’m not sure if they understand what it is like when the anxiety and depression take over. How every fear or worry… Continue reading Trying is Exhausting
I really try. Though it may seem like I don’t. It seems like every time I try taking a step forward, I somehow end up two steps back. Sometimes I don’t even know I’m doing it. Other times I’m too lost to realize what I’m doing. Sometimes I don’t know the difference between acting “crazy”… Continue reading Cycle of the Kitchen Floor
There’s these particular type of people who I find incredibly “badass,” “cool,” “risk-takers,” “hardcore,” or whatever word you would like to substitute. These are the people who ski in the backcountry, the ones that rock climb a thousand feet, who bike across the country, the ones who are “daring” or “adventurous”. I always wanted to… Continue reading Being a Badass
Some days I’m just not okay. Sometimes I need to cry. Other days I don’t feel anything. I don’t know what to do sometimes on either of those days. Today was one of those days. I didn’t sleep well because my anxiety kept me up. I arrived home and slightly didn’t know what to do.… Continue reading My Mess Today
Going to therapy is hard. I love it, but it can be incredibly difficult. Since the summer of my junior year before high school, I have seen around seven therapists or psychologists and two psychiatrists. For some, I only saw them for a session or two, but others I went to for a little bit… Continue reading My Therapy Journey
The first artist that came to mind was Maria Mena. Not many people know who she is in Connecticut or even the United States. She had one album released here – “White Turns Blue.” I started to get into her a few years after that album was released. I was doing my perusing on YouTube,… Continue reading Day 15: A band/musical artist whose music impacted your life.
This past weekend was Christmas. I swear I was looking forward to it. My brother was coming home. I would be able to spend time with him, parents, sister, and niece. I ruined it, or, I guess, my mental health ruined it. I couldn't enjoy any of it. I left early Christmas day, skipping Christmas… Continue reading Day 14: Someone who has made your life worth living.
Today I wanted to quit. I wanted to leave it all. I became so tired of trying to be okay, giving, pushing through. I wanted to go home and crawl under a blanket. I wanted to cry. I wanted not to think. I wanted to skip over the next few months. I wanted not to… Continue reading When I want to quit…